If she has second thoughts




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Partial Estonian translation

To "help" her decide, when she already wants it, you can try these pattern-like approaches:

Ross Jeffries:

"We shouldn't do it, and we shouldn't enjoy so much. And please don't try to convince me, that you'd really want to do it… now… with me, this is the way I see it…"

"I just talked to my friend, Tina, and she told me it is so unbelievably unfair, that men can make love to any woman they choose, but if a woman wants to express exercise and enjoy her sexual liberty, she is frowned upon. And I completely agree with her, frowning is just an expression of utter hypocrisy. For example, have you ever met a guy and instantaneously felt an irresistible attraction and fascination, that soon thoughts and feelings start flashing in your mind that you'd like to act upon and make a reality right away? It is just so unfortunate, how the society frowns when you just relax and let go and truly enjoys your feelings… now… with me… the way I see this is that (bla-bla:)…"

"Have you ever met someone (sp) and instantaneously feel such a complete attraction for him (sp), that you feel like you just _have_ to do something about it? It's the kind of feeling, that you just have to get near that guy and you know, that even if you never see him again, you'll be happy with all your choices and you'll always cherish the pleasant memories?"


Update. Aside from patterning your way around her second-thoughts, you could also tackle her possible objections (to going out with you, to sleeping with you etc) head-on. But this will only work in case these objections are for real - meaning they are not some BS-excuses meant to just jerk you around until she decides to LJBF you. Differentiating between BS- and real excuses is not easy to do as many excuses that sound like complete BS to men are very real for women indeed.

The following example taken from "Sweep women off their feet..." illustrates a BS-sounding but real objection and how it was overcome:

"There was this girl who used to be a model. She was absolutely gorgeous and had a great body. She was always concerned that her butt was too big. I had the hardest time seducing her and trying to make love because of it. She was hot and bothered, she wanted to have sex as much as I did but this silly little thing was stopping her. She didn't want me to see her naked because she was ashamed of her "big butt" and she was afraid I wouldn't find her attractive anymore. Anything I would say to let her know that her butt is just fine was met with resistance. "The only reason you're saying that is because you don't want to hurt my feelings," she kept saying. So what happened? We compromised. We had sex in complete darkness so I can't see her big butt. It took us sleeping together a few times before she was comfortable enough for me to see her naked, and of course, she went on a diet before that."

Ideally she should of course be so attracted to you after all the patterning and value-eliciting etc, that she just doesn't care any more and simply has to have you. However you can not always count on that, in which case it is easier to find out what her possible objections might be and then do your best to make the issues go away.

If you can't seem to figure out, what exactly her objections are, you can make it more comfortable for her to tell you by using this slightly humorous approach: "Imagine I have a magic wand and I can use this magic wand to make anything I wish just disappear. So just tell me one thing you'd like for me to make disappear in order for you to feel comfortable about us going out together (or going to my place/your place:). It can be absolutely anything - maybe a person, or some attitude of our society, or a project you need to finish in time, maybe something about yourself, or something about me - absolutely anything. But what would that one thing (you'd like to disappear in order for you to feel comfortable about us being together) be?"

There's a good chance that after having formulated her objection, it starts to look smaller and even insignificant to herself already. But you didn't ask the above question just to rely on that. Depending on the objection you should now be trying to eliminate or lessen the obstacle any way you can (patterning your (her:) way around it, reaching some sort of a compromise etc).


Update. The following strategy is designed to eliminate any possible second-thoughts she might have before she ever has them. For that purpose you will have to give her what Jobet Claudio from Mindlist calls The Mental Escape Hatch:

"When closing the deal with a woman, always, and always, and always provide her Mental Escape Hatch. More often than not a woman will have an internal conflict about fucking with someone who's not her boyfriend or husband. This may stem mostly from societal programming and no woman will want to have herself labelled as a "tramp", either by herself or by society.

Thus it is incumbent upon you to create a Mental Escape Hatch for a woman. In simpler words, give her an EXCUSE to have sex with you. In effect, she must be able to retain her self-worth even after she's had the tremendous experience of doing it with you. And you do that by creating a mental escape hatch, an excuse, or a scapegoat upon which she can point blame as to why "it happenned". That excuse can range from the lame to the profound, but it doesn't matter too much. Just do it and give her an excuse - give her an excuse to fuck you.

For example, if you wanna take her to your place, you aint gonna tell her: "Hey, lets go to my place and fuck". In her mind, an alarm goes off saying "Yea! I wanna... um... Tramp! Tramp! Tramp!"

The right way to do it is to present something that could be interesting to her. "Hey... wanna see my Picasso collection (owws?)... I've got a wonderful collection of rare love music in my pad... wanna listen to them and maybe we'll go for a nightcap... then I'll walk you home (subtitle: in the morning)?"

Then of course there's alcohol. A great excuse for many. You drink a couple of glasses of wine. You fire off your NLS routine. She falls for it and you make love on the couch. In the morning, she can always tell herself "Ohh...must have been the wine". Great huh? A mental escape hatch. An internal excuse.

What's the mechanics of this? What does it do? It allows her by shifting responsibility to someone or something else other than herself, to retain her self-steem. And if you know what you're doing, don't and I mean DON'T try to break down her excuse. More often than not, the mere fact that she did it with you one time is already an excuse for her to do it again. By then, the psychological barriers have been broken down.

Mental Escape Hatches can be used in the pre- and post-fuck stages. As a pre-fuck routine, it disarms resistance by presenting different motives other than sex. As a post-fuck routine, it ensures that the woman won't feel bad about "doing it" and you wont get something akin to buyers remorse.

For example, with one of my partners, I asked her "Hey... I've got Sleepless in Seattle at home. Wanna watch a home movie with me? There'll be popcorn and some wine". She went. We did it. Mentally, she would say to herself "We never intended to do it... we just went there to watch a movie, but I got so swept away by my emotions from the film... so when he kissed me it just felt so right"

See also:
At Least We Can Be Friends pattern
Our World routine


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